April 06, 2007

Son asks Dad about world domination

This entire conversation between a Son (S) and his Dad (D) came to my mind on an idle moment almost exactly as i write it here, very vividly and memorably. The turn of phrase that ends it left me wondering enough to stop dreaming the conversation:

S: Daddy, how do i conquer the World?
D: Oh, well, it would help to be the king’s nephew. You would get almost all of the same rights as the king’s son, but almost none of his duties.
S: And then, what?
D: Then, you wait until the king’s son has studied, prepared, thought and organized for his own kingdom. That’s where you come in, killing the king’s son just when the king is old and sick, and then come into possession of the crown.
S: And then I would become the king of the world?
D: No. Only of a country. Well, it would help to be the nephew of all the kings in the world; that is, of course, granting that all the countries had kings and all the world was covered with countries.
S: Well, isn’t it?
D: Nominally, yes. In practice, no.
S: What about the earth’s core and the rest of the solar system?
D: Mmm. Those are yet to be claimed.
S: Isn’t God their claimant already?
D: Nominally, yes. In practice, no. I mean, it is, until new order.
S: New order? From who?
D: From whoever else manages to claim them too.
S: It’s a bargain! How many have claimed it?
D: No one. You first need a lot of technology, people and energy.
S: Well, how do you get those?
D: You first wait until the world’s population is dense enough, and the technology is advanced enough.
S: And how long do I have to wait?
D: Until they invent the cryonic capsule: then you ask them to freeze you until the world population has reached some number: say, double what it is now, and until enough familiarity with outer space has seeped in the culture; say, when there are permanent dwellers in the moon already.
S: And then they’ll unfreeze me when either or both of those conditions are met?
D: Preferably, both.
S: And if none of those conditions are ever met?
D: Mmm. I hadn’t thought of that. It’s an improbable but possible scenario, yeah.
S: I could leave a third condition: When some number of years have passed since my crionization. Then they’ll unfreeze me when whatever comes first comes.
D: What?
S: They’ll unfreeze me whenever comes first.

1 comment:

David Suescun said...

or... i could be unfreeze 1000 years from now and start a tv program, let's say named.. humm... i don't know... FUTURAMA! and then conquer the world with my 21st century charms ;)